Made of Glass or Made for Grace? How Christians Should Handle Offense

Made of Glass or Made for Grace? How Christians Should Handle Offense

RJ Thompson

8/27/20256 min read

Do you ever feel like you're walking through life made of glass—fragile, easily cracked by harsh words, shattered by criticism, and constantly on guard against the next blow that might break you completely? If you find yourself replaying conversations for days, losing sleep over someone's tone, or feeling wounded by every perceived slight, you're not alone. But here's the question that might change everything: Is this hypersensitivity how God designed His children to live?

The short answer, according to Scripture, is no. While God calls us to be tenderhearted toward others, He also calls us to be thick-skinned when it comes to personal offense. The Christian life isn't meant to be lived on emotional eggshells, constantly wounded and reactive. Instead, God offers us a better way—a way of grace, strength, and unshakeable peace.

What Scripture Says About Being Easily Offended

The Bible is remarkably clear about how believers should handle offense. In 1 Corinthians 13:5, Paul writes that love "is not easily angered" and "keeps no record of wrongs." The Greek word for "easily angered" is paroxuno, which means to be provoked, irritated, or stirred up to wrath. True Christian love—the kind we're called to walk in—isn't quick to take offense or harbor resentment.

Proverbs 19:11 goes even further: "A person's wisdom yields patience; it is to one's glory to overlook an offense." Notice that overlooking an offense isn't presented as weakness—it's described as glory. It takes strength, wisdom, and maturity to let things roll off your back rather than absorbing every slight like a sponge.

Perhaps most challenging of all, Proverbs 18:19 warns us that "a brother wronged is more unyielding than a fortified city; disputes are like the barred gates of a citadel." When we choose to be offended, we often become harder to reach, more defensive, and more isolated than we were before. Offense builds walls, not bridges.

The Heart Behind Hypersensitivity

Before we dive deeper into what Scripture calls us to, let's acknowledge the heart behind hypersensitivity. Often, people who are easily offended are actually deeply caring individuals. They notice nuances in tone, pick up on subtle shifts in relationships, and feel things deeply. These can be beautiful qualities—the same sensitivity that makes you notice when someone seems sad can also make you wounded by their distant tone.

Sometimes hypersensitivity stems from past hurts. If you've been genuinely wounded, betrayed, or rejected, your nervous system might be on high alert, interpreting neutral interactions as threats. Trauma can make our emotional skin paper-thin, causing us to react to perceived dangers that may not actually exist.

Other times, being easily offended reveals deeper heart issues: pride, insecurity, or making our identity dependent on others' approval. When our sense of worth is fragile, every criticism feels like an attack on our very being. When we secretly struggle with pride, correction feels like assault.

How Jesus Handled Offense

If we want to know how to respond to offense as Christians, we need look no further than Jesus Himself. Throughout His ministry, Jesus faced constant criticism, mockery, false accusations, and outright hostility. Religious leaders called Him a fraud, His own family thought He was crazy (Mark 3:21), His disciples constantly misunderstood Him, and crowds that praised Him one day wanted Him crucified the next.

How did He respond? With remarkable stability and grace.

When the Pharisees accused Him of casting out demons by Satan's power, Jesus didn't lash out or defend His reputation—He calmly explained their logical error (Matthew 12:25-28). When Peter rebuked Him for talking about His coming death, Jesus corrected him firmly but didn't reject him (Matthew 16:23). Even when Judas betrayed Him with a kiss, Jesus called him "friend" (Matthew 26:50).

Most remarkably, from the cross—the ultimate place of offense and injustice—Jesus prayed, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing" (Luke 23:34). Jesus wasn't easily offended because His identity wasn't dependent on others' opinions. He knew who He was, why He came, and what He was called to do.

The Difference Between Righteous Anger and Personal Offense

It's important to note that not being easily offended doesn't mean being passive or never standing up for what's right. Jesus displayed righteous anger when He cleansed the temple (John 2:13-16), and He spoke sharp words to the Pharisees when they hindered others from entering God's kingdom (Matthew 23).

The key difference is this: righteous anger is about defending others or protecting what is holy, while personal offense is about protecting our ego, reputation, or comfort. Jesus was angered by injustice toward others but remained calm when personally attacked.

Building Emotional Resilience Through Scripture

So how do we move from being made of glass to being made for grace? Scripture offers us several powerful strategies:

Ground your identity in God, not people's opinions. Galatians 1:10 asks, "Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ." When we know we're beloved children of God, others' opinions lose their power to devastate us.

Choose to believe the best about others' intentions. 1 Corinthians 13:7 says love "believes all things"—meaning love gives others the benefit of the doubt. Instead of assuming that sharp tone was meant to hurt you, consider that they might be stressed, tired, or dealing with their own struggles.

Practice the discipline of overlooking minor offenses. Start small. When someone cuts you off in traffic, choose not to take it personally. When a coworker seems curt in an email, assume they're busy rather than rude. Building this muscle with small irritations prepares you for bigger challenges.

Remember that others' behavior says more about them than about you. Hurt people hurt people. When someone is harsh with you, it often reveals their own pain, insecurity, or stress rather than anything wrong with you.

The Freedom of Not Taking Things Personally

Here's what many people don't realize: choosing not to be easily offended isn't just about obeying God's word—it's about personal freedom. When you're constantly wounded by others' words and actions, you're essentially giving them control over your emotional well-being. You become reactive rather than responsive, driven by their behavior rather than God's character.

But when you develop holy thick skin—staying soft-hearted toward others while being resilient to offense—you experience incredible freedom. You can love people without needing their approval. You can serve without fear of criticism. You can be corrected without being crushed. You can disagree without being disagreeable.

Practical Steps for Becoming Less Easily Offended

Before you react, pause and ask: "Is this worth my peace?" Most things that feel offensive in the moment seem much smaller after a good night's sleep.

Develop a daily practice of forgiveness. Each evening, consciously release any hurts, slights, or irritations from the day. Don't let them build up into bitterness.

Practice gratitude for difficult people. This sounds impossible, but difficult people often teach us patience, force us to depend on God's strength, and reveal areas where we need to grow.

Seek to understand before seeking to be understood. When someone says something that wounds you, ask clarifying questions before assuming their intent. "What did you mean when you said...?" can prevent many unnecessary offenses.

Remember that you're not responsible for others' opinions of you, only for your character. Focus on being the person God called you to be rather than managing how others perceive you.

The Glory of Overlooking Offense

Proverbs 19:11 calls it glory to overlook an offense, and there's deep wisdom in this. When you choose not to be offended, you're reflecting God's character. After all, how many times has God overlooked your offenses against Him? How often has He chosen grace over wrath, mercy over judgment?

Every time you choose to overlook a slight, extend grace instead of demanding an apology, or respond with kindness to rudeness, you're showcasing the transformative power of the Gospel. You're proving that God's people don't have to be driven by emotion or controlled by others' behavior.

You're demonstrating that Christians are made not of glass, but of something far stronger—the unbreakable love and grace of God Himself.

"Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." (Proverbs 4:23)

The heart that's guarded by God's truth and grounded in His love isn't easily shaken by the storms of offense. It remains steady, gracious, and free—just as God intended.